Is Sobriety Hard ?

What's hard about sobriety, or is it even hard? Is it the motivation, the decision, or the process that makes sobriety hard? I am in no place to give a permanent view on this, but rather an enlightening perspective on what we call 'Sobriety'.

The term sobriety is applied when there is a previous event of addiction.

What then is an 'Addiction'?

In my research, I have seen addiction not as a choice that anybody makes, a moral failure, a lapse, or a weakness of character as society may depict it.

Dr.Gabor Maté mentioned that when looking at addiction, you can't look at what's wrong with the addiction. You have to look at what's right about it. This means looking at what the person is getting that they otherwise don't have and what addicts get is relief from pain, a sense of peace, control, and calmness which is very temporal. The question then is why these are missing from their lives.

Addiction can then be likened to a response to suffering. And what people need in response is not judgment, or simply response control, they need to be helped to be healed from whatever trauma, pain, or suffering had caused this.

What then is 'Sobriety'?

If we have stated that addiction is a response to pain and suffering, perhaps sobriety would mean finding better ways to cope, heal and recover from these things.

It's finding true happiness in the moments that matter, without relying on substances.

I believe that the pivotal factor that propels someone towards sobriety is a personal realization and acknowledgment of the need to make changes to their life. It's not really about how much someone desires for someone else, how much one pleads, or how much external forces try to compel an individual to become sober.

The Journey of 'Sobriety'

It might then start with a simple thought such as 'I want to make my life better', or 'I need to stop', or any other thought that shows a desire for change. These thoughts can then present us with new information to aid us in that pursuit. Using that information can enable us to move, act, observe, and improve.

But know this, we can attend the best rehabs and have the best therapist, mentor, and sponsor, all in the attempt to get sober (all these counts), but if you don't do the right thing when no one is watching, the change might seem impossible. So, I guess, we are on a journey, working on the same mission, to get another day sober, so we can live our best lives and provide a safe place within ourselves.

Is it hard?

It's hard to get the motivation to get sober, especially when in the trenches of addiction, it's easy to say 'Today will be the last or tomorrow'. What's harder is putting action behind those words.

Sobriety could be hard because it comes with clarity and you realize your regrets, fears, insecurities, and trauma and you cannot hide from it.

Therefore, the challenge might be in processing our emotions, which is also real work as recovery takes place.

I learned that you are as sick as your secrets, and the more you can share these things, the more you heal and the better you feel. When you're able to put your guard down and let someone in, and ask for help things can change. I admit to it that the first 90 days are the bravest, those first 90 days are hard, then the 1st year, then the 1st 2 years.

So,🙂, I guess in all I don't have a conclusion for the difficulty level of sobriety. I don't think I am in a place to give a say fully.

Some might say that getting sober was the hardest thing, others might say it's the best thing, and some might consider it a legacy because of their biological family background.

You clear away the obstacles from your vision by ceasing to engage in those activities you know to be wrong, and the world starts to lay itself in a more pristine form. That way you can start to apprehend what would be positively good instead of not merely wrong. — Jordan Peterson

Here's my final conclusion on what I'd have to say ———————

"To anyone out there, or you currently reading this, pursuing sobriety is a personal race, it's your fight and it's your win. See it has healing, your heart on its crotches learning how to walk again. It's taking stable, safer, and sober steps each day. It's choosing to be realistic about what you're up against. And you never have to handle more than one day at a time. It is putting systems to either keep you from relapsing or helping you up, in the event of a relapse.

It is understanding that you want this for yourself and nobody else. It is knowing that you are doing it for yourself and nobody else.

The past hurts, your trauma is real, but more real is the power to overcome."

Farewell! 👋🙋‍♀️